99S62 Rawks

That's my sentiments. My honest sentiments.

You know sometimes you only miss something or cherish it when it's gone. Well that's what I feel about my JC class. I can't remember much about my secondary school class or my primary school class for the matter; but my JC class that's different.

Had a buffet at a nice Japanese BBQ restuarant called Yaki no Yuki. I think that's the name of the place. Anyways, with good food, great friends and good conversation...what more can I ask for in a class reunion?

Anyways, as we talked and listen to each other's stories, I can't help but feel that somethings just don't change over the years. It's true that we're all growing up. Becoming adults and experts in our respective fields. But our personalities and mannerisms very much remain the way they were since the day we met. Of course that's not to discount the fact that we mature and some mindsets change, but we remain very much who we've always been.

I kinda like that... In the face changing world we live in and the various changes that happen in our lives, there is some comfort in this.

What can I say 99S62 Rawks!

ps: ok it's kinda kiddish but .... oh well...

First Week of School AY0506

School's started. And so begins the hectic life of a student once more. Did I mention that I'm glad I'm a student? Well I am. If I ever had the oppotrunity, I don't wanna graduate... well that's just plain stupid..but sometimes I think of doing a Masters or PhD just so that I don't need to out to the workplace...But i guess if all Christians think like that then who will be His witnesses in the workplace? Who will stand out and be counted for Him...Oh well...I'll enjoy my student identity for the next 2 years at least.

There was a Raffles Hall Welcome Supper for all the Christians and pre-Believers in Raffles Hall on Thursday. Thinking back about it, I find myself in those freshmen's shoes 2 years ago and I wonder how did I ended up staying in this Hall for 3 years of my undergraduate life. I started out just wanting to experience Hall culture for the fun of it. But as I did my activites from Concert Marketing, Touch Rugby, Hockey ,Unplugged and Block Committee member, I find each year a reason to stay and do my activites. But for my final year next year, will I also find another reason to stay...

I think back of some of the decisions made in as a Resident of the RH and I can't help but find glimpse of His grace all round. I found out about VCF in the Contact Group in Hall and that's where I still serve. Even now in the capacity of a Hall Contact Group Coordinator. That was unconceivable in Year 1 but look where I am now.

I am reminded of the many struggles I faced as an undergraduate and as a Christian Student. The many decsions I had to make. To turn up for CG or to study for a test the next day. The struggle to set aside time to prepare for the Bible study and finally to surrender to God's plan for me and take up the mantle as an Exco Member. None of them where easy but each was indeed a test of faith and a demonstration of God's faithfulness to a child who is faithless...

I message kept ringing through my ears in the various Welcome Suppers I attended in the capacity of an Exco member. I keep hearing the words, "You are here not by chance, but for a reason" As I recount the incidents in my life and lessons I learn these 2 years...I cannot rest on my knees and say and "Amen" to that. Amen.

How many shattered dreams or my own selfish ways did He replace with His awesome plans that seek only to prosper me and not to harm me... I have but truely lost count...

If any thought that I must bring into this new academic year, it is that of thankfulness and Hid own faithfulness despite mine own faithlessness.

Dumbfounded

I'm dumbfounded.

I not sure how to put this, but I just dun get some people at all. They call you friends or brothers but many times they are more of an added pressure than anything else. Not sources of support or help but people with strange expectations. The worst deal is that they make a whole lot of assumptions about you and hold that as as true... The story goes that I was late today for some stupid talk that I didn't want to attend in the first place. Well just 5 mins anyway.

Ok I admit there are alot of things that I'm always late for so penalise me for that. It' something I need to learn: punctuality. But when people tell you off each time you're late like you're some unreliable kid it get really annoying. Then they start questioning your character: They ask if I brush them aside cause I didn't seat with them during the talk. They remind you of the time when I didn't seat with them during meals from some other occasions and conclude among themselves that I'm Mr High and Mighty. I try to explain to them the circumstances and still they maintain their conclusion. It may be placed in a joking manner but it really isn't funny at all.

I don't think I like it very much when people take pot shots at your character. It just isn't right. And it get really painful when these are your friends. You think they know you but they don't. I can shrug senseless comments if they just come once in a while. But keep getting at it and ganging up together over and over again...There's only so much a person can shrug off before it gets to him...

I'm still wondering if such individuals can be considered friends. Or are they mere aquaintances whom you see often enough.... I know there are things that I need to change but I always thought friends were more accomodating. I guess not all are like that.....

I'm not staying in my room the whole day slacking away. I'm doing things that matter to me and are important. I go late because things are sometimes not as important or I'm caught up with other things. But I do try. Give me some credit. Don't judge my character and impose your presupposed view of me when you have no idea who I really am...Or what I'm going through. I know there are things I'm not perfect in...But show me someone perfect then. I feel so maligned!!

*Sigh*

There I got it off my chest. But I don't feel any better. Maybe I should confront them with this. Hmm...Maybe.... If there's a chance.

PS: I apologize for the angry words. There's a high probability that it does not refer to you. This is just my avenue for angst.

Flag Day AY050/06

Well internship has ended for me. No more programming and stuff. It's time I reverted back to being a relatively carefree student who is master of of his own time. For better or for worst. It's amazing that what was accomplished in the 2 months had to be fitted into a CD. Give me a sense if satisfaction that my friend and I had created something that's actually workable. A software that might be used by an actual client.

Anyway, that's just last week. This week's been pretty exciting so far. On Monday I went with the RHOCers to rent a truck for flag day. They needed someone who is above 21 years and had a licence for 2 years. Well I fit both the bills and so I went. But I insisted on not driving. Wanted to just be a backup driver since I hadn't driven a manual car in ages much less a truck.

But as the story goes, I went for a familirization / spying course around the school. Bascially, scouted on the other floats that were being built by the other halls. And I must say that some halls are pretty secretive when it comes to float. They took pains to cover the process of making their float and even as to have a guard on duty.

Anyway, I drove over to IMM from NUS and thought that was it. Little did I know I was designated to drive the next morning at 7 am. I calculated the total duration is about 11 hours on the road excluding the breaks in between. Quite amazing for a guy who didn't dare to drive barely 12 hours before.

School's starting next week. Got to prepare my heart to study. God has been gracious to bring me this far. It's time for retrospection and inspection of my life thus far...